Ernest Hemingway:

As Ernest Hemingway once said...
'All you have to do is write one true sentence. Write the truest sentence that you know.'

Monday, February 04, 2008

it's finally over

So the dreaded day is finally over - I went on Saturday to see the Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus 3D movie, 'The Best of Both Worlds' with my 'little' bro. To sum things up - it most certainly is not the best of both worlds, or any world, for that matter.

Miley Cyrus is a cute girl, she's got a good voice, and I believe she even writes some, if not all, of her own music. And she's 15 - that's something to be able to perform in front of a massive crowd at that age. And her music isn't that bad. It isn't that good, but hey, even I liked crap as a young tot - NKOTB, anyone? I was slightly obsessed. Props to my parents for suffering through a concert with me and my dorky big-button wearing friends.

Anyway, I know she lip synched, at least part of the time. I was so bored I actually paid attention. I get that if you're dancing a lot, it's hard to sing. No big deal. Plenty of performers do that. I know she can sing. The most hilarious part was the Jonas Brothers. They might play instruments in real life, and on the album and whatnot, but they totally didn't play them in concert. At one point one of the kids is strumming away on the guitar then stops, hands it to some joe from offstage, and starts singing and dancing, yet the guitar playing doesn't stop. It doesn't take a detective. Then another time the camera pans to one of them playing the piano, and literally, his hands are resting on the keys - not moving at all. Miraculously, however, the piano keeps on playing.

And the clothes. Man, do kids really dress like that? If I had severe amnesia, and this movie was the first thing I saw, I'd think we were back in the heyday of the 80s. Acid wash jeans, black high tops (like Reeboks), leggings, hot pink everywhere - frightening. I swear, the Jonas Brothers were wearing leggings made to look like jeans, that's how tight they were. I get the tight-ish jeans thing with All Stars, but seriously, I could see the outline of their thighs. No, not their thingys - get your head out of the gutter. I did look, though, because theoretically they should have been there. GROSS. And again, I was unbelievably bored.

The 3D was evident, it was kind of neat, but overall a waste of 3D technology. There were previews of 2 3D movies before it started, and those short previews were way cooler than the entire Hannah Montana 3D concert experience.

The kids did seem to like it, and my bro certainly did. He made me listen to the Disney Channel on AM on the car ride to and from the mills, and believe me, I was on teenie-bopper overload. As soon as he got out of the car I felt the urge to listen to something extremely heavy and screamy IE Dimmu Borgir - alas all I had was Dustin Kensrue's solo album (from Thrice), which sufficed as it's a great album.

Now I have 'The Best of Both Worlds' song in my head. Not good. Feeling the urge to strangle myself. Once, fine. Repeatedly, very bad, especially when the only words I know are 'The Best of Both Worlds'. Arrrrrrggggghhhhhhh.

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